Random blabber part 2

I will finally admit this; I don't have any muscle mass. My core is so weak, it might as well be jello! I almost died doing pilates. Not only did I have to do the modified moves, I could not hold the positions long enough. The session was nauseatingly painful, and I'm still sore, two days later. Long gone are the days I considered myself athletic. I need to admit that to myself and start from zero, beginner level =(

How bad is the recession? I am living in a bubble and I have no idea how bad the financial situation is. Am I not supposed to shop or is it just the big stuff? Yeah, I'm an airhead when it comes to politics and finance.

I am a planner, I function best when I have a planner, old school paper and pen, not PDAs. I am more credible and tend to stick to my plans when I see it on writing. I restarted using one last week and I suddenly remembered why I was so efficient back in the days I used one. I am back on track now, and enshalla I am determined to stick to what works.

I am trying to improve myself, mind, body and spirit. It's not easy being virtuous all the time, but I'm taking baby steps. It takes 40 days (?21, ?28, I never remember what the number is!) to make a habit. Seven days down, by the end of March I want to be content with my improved self.

I have a countless book marks, store bought, hand-made, from holidays, conferences, lectures, events. Yet I manage to bookmark with random things, a receipt, a tissue paper, a business card. Brick Lane this week is bookmarked with a plaster bandage!

I can't help crying every time I see a child with autism. I pretend to be strong for every one's sake, but when I am miles away, I break down a little bit, so I rebuild a stronger me, for them.

Random blabber

Four years I've been doing something wrong. Today someone taught me the right way of doing it. Imagine, four years, and all I needed was a tweak in my technique. It was like someone suddenly switched on the lights!

I colored the tips of my nails with a yellow felt-pen I was using as a highlighter while studying. Now, my nails have a yellow dirty tinge. Nasty!

There's something called over-sharing. Get a hint. Stop talking.

I've been dreaming about you almost nightly. I hope you are well. And that occasionally you dream about me too.

Soundtrack of the day:
I’m having trouble sleeping
You’re jumping in my bed
Twisting in my head
Leave me

I’m having trouble breathing
You’re sitting on my chest
I sure could use the rest
Leave me

It’s you
Why’s it always you
and never me?
I’ve never dared to let
my feelings free
Why’s it always you
and never me?
I’ve never cared
too much about honesty

I’m having trouble sleeping
I’m thinking of what you said
About the tears been shed
Leave me

The Perishers

Lessons learned from The curious case of Benjamin Button

I wish I read the book before watching the movie.

Don't waste your youth. This is the time you will look and feel your best. This is when your body is in its best shape and your health pristine. Live your dreams. Travel. Be spontaneous. Be wild. Don't sit around waiting for life to come knocking on your door.

Embrace getting old. Everyone gets old eventually, it's how you take it that matters. Age gracefully. Take pride in the experiences life has given you. Pass on the legacy.

Death is eminent. Have no regrets. Live to your full potential. Let go in peace.

An inspiring and uplifting movie!

A series of misfortunate events

Do you know what a bad week feels like? I am having one of those.
I receive disturbing news on Thursday, try to smile through them on Friday, only to be slapped by the fact that I am dispensable on Saturday. I try to swim through the ever-growing self-pity, only to be given more reason to drown in misery on Sunday. I cry on my way to try to cheer myself up, then I cry some more when I realize how sad it is to cry when everyone around is laughing. I try to get an endorphin rush but my body gives up on me and betrays me. And that's all on Monday. Let's see what mid-week crisis holds.

I feel so vulnerable, the slightest thing is making me sad.

Unexpected results

Casually passed by to pick up the test results, one week later than I was supposed to.
She stated the results matter of factly.
My head spins.
She off-handedly said I needed a referral, not even bothering to give me any further details.
I vow not to be like her. I promise to go the extra mile. I promise to care. Sometimes ignorance is a bliss, I wish I did not know what the results meant instantly.
I am scared.
I am going through the algorithm in my head.
I am trying to remember the statistics.
I am still scared.

اللهم اشفنا انت الشافي لا شفاء الا شفاؤك شفاء لا يغادر سقما

Why does a 20 years old guy marrying a 23 years old girl shock me?
I don't mind the age difference per say, I mind the age difference at this young age!
Is it weird that I find this weird?

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